spin the pork

my birthday was over a month ago, but i'm still thoroughly enjoying the gift i received from eel:

jesus, step aside. the answer to any of life's complicated questions can be found by asking yourself "what would bacon do?" and spinning the pork. answers range from "shrivel" to "taste really good," though my favorite is "spit hot grease" - something i intend to do frequently.

b+p readers, if you feel really terrible about the gift you didn't get me for my birthday this year, don't fret. please see: chanukah wish list.

oh, and speaking of pigs, the last three meals i've eaten:

1. pizza

2. pizza

3. pizza

that's dinner, lunch, dinner, for those of you playing at home.

p.s. please note, regarding the photo above: i would NEVER get a D+ on a report....especially if it was a report on bacon.